I decided to take a break from writing my manuscript and I chose to check my horoscope for today. I am not really into horoscopes, but sometimes, I do check it at the end of the day, just to check if what was written in there happened to me to some extent *Big grin*. But today, since I am so wide awake at 2:42 am, I tried to take a peek of what’s in store for me today, “kuno” *Smug* . And here goes my horoscope for today:
When your schedule loosens up and presents you with a great big chunk of free time today, fill up that unexpected gap with intellectual pursuits. Pick up a thick novel, see a foreign film, or do whatever else that gets your mind really humming. This is a good time for deep thought and contemplation — it would be a shame to fritter away the hours with mindless channel-surfing, shopping or napping. You need to do something mental, something stimulating.
This made me laugh…for even before this day, without this horoscope, I know that I really need to spend most of my waking hours in intellectual pursuit chuva (now I remember my friend EJ’s text message about the word “chuva”, :D). Weeeeee…intellectual pursuit! Seems like I am gonna be in Einstein mode until the day I will have the final approval of my manuscript. (Sigh!) But it seems more fulfilling now, especially with every paragraph that I add on my discussion. Fulfilling for me because recently, I realized that I successfully earned credits on a more complicated pursuit that I’ve been through lately. And that is increasing my EQ! More complicated in the sense that I was able to identify those insignificant entities in my life without using statistical models! A little bit harder part is to get rid of those insignificant variables and keep those highly significant ones in my life! Hahaha…
Gotta go back now to my work now…
What a relevant horoscope for today and the coming days! …*winks*…
Auf Wiedersehen (owf VEE-der-say-en)…I first heard of this phrase in my all-time favourite movie- Sound of Music. It’s a German word and it means goodbye.
When I was a kid, I deal with goodbyes differently.I cried when Ate Quim leaves home for work or when Tatay and Nanay would attend athletic meets.Though I know they would be home soon.
Then I left for college and had a lot of goodbye-sessions.Waiting for the bus is a torment to me for I have to keep my tears from rolling down.I don’t want my family to see me sad especially my dear late Tatay.I am afraid of goodbyes…What if that would be the last goodbye? For every goodbye comes a prayer with me that we will be seeing each other again soon. I am so into this set up for my fourteen years of stay in Leyte. I thought I am this expert with goodbyes…
‘Twas 2007 when I have to leave Pinas. I had a simple despedida where all my cousins, Tiya’s and Tiyo’s were there. It was kind of hard for me to say goodbye. In 2008, my Tiya Upe and Tiyo Cardo passed away and unexpectedly my Tatay. It hurt me so badly. I can’t bear the thought that I wouldn’t be able to hear and feel them when I will be home. But have to move on…else my Tatay would be disappointed.
I thought that would be all for that year. In the same year, people who are so dear to me also took part in teaching me how to say goodbye in some other way. Dealing with the situation was really hard for me and it almost mashed me to pieces. I have to say goodbye to them when actually it is the time when I needed them the most! But then, I can say, I am quite adept now with this kind of situation, and it made me a better, stronger person.
Now…after beating this game of “saying goodbye”, I realized what I need now…I need more HELLOs!
I happen to accidentally open a site with a research about a drug that can eliminate traumatic memory from a person. Then I remember a phrase which is often mentioned just lately in some of my conservations - selective amnesia. The free dictionary online defined (in toto) selective amnesia as an “amnesia about particular events that is very convenient for the person who cannot remember”. Furthermore, there is also this posthypnotic amnesia which is a “selective amnesia after being in a hypnotic state of events occurring during hypnosis or of information designated by the hypnotist”. These made me smile and thought of how the brains of those people who are in this kind of amnesia are working.
This state is advantageous when you met a traumatic experience or a disagreeable person (perhaps?) in your life and you want to just forget all about it. But when it comes to friends? I doubt. For me, friends are the siblings that God forget to give me. I am this so idealistic when it comes to friendship. No matter what happen, true friends will always be with me. Our communication may wane out for some time due to certain circumstances but for sure I won’t forget a person who has been a part of who I am now in just a snap of a finger. I am just so curious what’s really going on in these beings that I considered my friends (whom I assume considers me as a friend, too J) that they seem to have selective (posthypnotic) amnesia on me…Is it really a choice? And why me? Or is it because of posthypnotic amnesia incurred by a sort of effective hypnotist? I don’t have the answers for now but I believe answers will be revealed in His most perfect time.
I’d rather get back to my data… 
..to move on and leave those unpleasant thoughts and feelings behind…
Here is another song by Toto that I wanna share for those who love and dream of forever …but seems that forever’s never meant to happen.
I’LL BE OVER YOU
Some people live their dreams
Some people close their eyes
Some people’s destiny
Passes by
There are no guarantees
There are no alibis
That’s how our love must be
Don’t ask why
Bridge:
It takes some time
God knows how long
I know that I can forget you
As soon as my heart stops breakin’
Anticipating
As soon as forever is through
I’ll be over you
Remembering times gone by
Promises we once made
What are the reasons why
Nothing stays the same
Bridge:
There were the nights holding you close
Someday I’ll try to forget them
Someday I’ll be over you
This is a poem written by Ate Hula about me and our friendship…
endo ang tawag ko sa knya
sa onze una ko syang nakita
hanef! sa trivia sya’y malupit!
akala ko nung una sya’y masungit!
gabi-gabi humahataw…gamer ay kinarir
akala ko nga nung una sya ay papa bear! (hihihi)
play lang kami…walang greet greet…
naalala mo ba kung pano tayo nag click???
hmmm… sa trivia ako’y iyong napabilib
’til ako’y mag “wd”… tenkz at di ka pala snobbish!
“the rest is history” ika nila…gossh! i can’t believe it!
gabi-gabi… ako na ang iyong kinakarir! lolzzz…
i heyt u mamaw alam mo yan! (hihihi)
sino ka ba talaga? bakit gaya-gaya ka! (hahaha)
sprite…chicken wings.. snoopy at iba pa!
miss ko ang ating paglalamay, hagikhikan ng walang humpay!
endo salamat sa yung time lagi kang anjan
ready to hug me pag ako’y balot ng kalungkutan
isa kang tunay na kaibigan…salamat sa yong tiwala…
makaasa ka ito’y aking iingatan at habambuhay na papahalagan!
ingat ka palagi mamaw! mwaaaaah!!!
…Thanks a lot for the new-found friendship! I hope this will last beyond cyberspace!
Time check…02:45..Yeah, it’s early in the morning and I am still awake. Just finished analysing part of my data and organizing my files. I don’t worry that much sleeping so early in the morning for I still get 8 hours of sleep for my wake up time now is at 10 or 11 am.
I am just so happy, for I was able to accomplish the things that I planned for today and made me feel so productive even if I multitasked. I am quite good with multi-tasking (Gemini yata to! hehe)… The only formula that I cannot have it perfected is to incorporate sleeping in my multitasking chuva… If that time comes, then maybe I will win a prize, Nobel perhaps!
I should not forget to mention the people who are so dear to me for making my 1st of May an inspiring one…Had a long talk with Ate Janet about anything! It gives me additional energy for the day when I woke up with a lot of text messages to read, no matter what the message is! Hehehe.. Ate Quim relayed a very exciting info and of course she never forgets to remind how they love me! There goes my Ate Hula with some warnings on her YM and Ate Nenet with some updates on her trip. And before going to bed now…I learned that Ate Judai, Kai and Onnie are gonna play badminton and reminding me that I will be home soon! I miss my Nanay’s messages ..wala daw sya load now..hehhehe…
One more thing! I am really surprised with Ate Hula’s comment for me which is in the form of a poem! She made it in less than half an hour, or even less! And it’s really, really well written! I am so thankful for such masterpiece which made me teary-eyed while running my analysis…It’s such a blessing to meet such kind of friend!
That’s all folks for 1st of May…tulog na ako..2nd of May na pala…:D
I found this piece of work by Marilyn Ferguson (2005) so inspiring! I just went through a storm lately.This one really helped me to see the rainbow and find the strength to move on!
THE POTTER’S WHEEL
When you’re troubled and discouraged
In the darkness of the night
When obstruction clouds your vision
And you just can’t see the light.
When life’s trials overcome you
And you have nowhere to turn
When you’ve reached the very bottom
There are lessons you must learn.
For the clay is being molded
It’s been twisted, pulled and tossed
It’s been rolled and it’s been pounded
Till the ego has been lost.
He will put you through the furnace
You’ll be tested to the brim
Your life will be in pieces
Till you give your soul to Him.
From blemish to perfection
His hands will form the clay
This human piece of rubble
Must let God have His way.
When you come to Him all battered
In the form of mortal man
When you cry to Him in mercy
You will find the Potter’s hand.
He will grind you, mold and chisel
The friction you will feel
Till He gently carves and shapes you
Upon the Potter’s wheel.
I decided to take a break from writing my manuscript and I chose to check my horoscope for today. I am not really into horoscopes, but sometimes, I do check it at the end of the day, just to check if what was written in there happened to me to some extent *Big grin*. But today, since I am so wide awake at 2:42 am, I tried to take a peek of what’s in store for me today, “kuno” *Smug* . And here goes my horoscope for today:
